Full Circle

Running is many different things to each runner. For some, peace. Others, strength. Others still, overcoming. For me, running embodies a sense of amazement. Every time I lace up, I'm faced with new challenges. I also learn more about myself than I could ever have imagined. Every run surprises me and every run exhilarates me. Even my worst runs leave a mark. One year ago, I wasn't a runner. I wasn't a walker, or any type of athlete. I was lazy, I was unhappy with myself, and I felt broken. Then I stumbled across a health expo during Tinker Bell Half Marathon weekend at Disneyland and my life immediately changed. Sparkle Skirts and runDisney drew me in. The running community and my new self-image kept me going.

I started finding pride I'd never experienced before. I starting loving myself, and my flaws became less obvious. Then, on January 19th, 2014, I accomplished something that I'd never before imagined was possible. I crossed the finish line of my very first half-marathon. Of course, it couldn't be just any half-marathon. I ran the very same event that inspired me to run in the first place. The 2014 Tinker Bell Half Marathon marked a day of personal victory, and incomparable joy.

Before the race I attended a meet-up for a Facebook group created specifically for this race. I've never encountered such an incredible group of people. I was amazed by the support the group had provided online, and the members were just as inspiring in person. I was moved by how welcoming everyone was, and it was so much fun to meet other runners in person! The leaders of the group provided goodies and prizes and shared inspiring stories and messages. I couldn't think of a better way to prepare for what seemed, to me at least, the extremely daunting task that lay ahead.

The next morning, I woke up at some freakish hour so early that even the sun was still sleeping. The energy in the corrals was far different than anything I ever experienced before. Women (and I'm sure men, although I wasn't near any) were giggling and sharing stories of runs past, their lives outside of running, their hopes and fears... Several women were passing out tokens of good luck like adorable tiny magic wands to be pinned to bibs, or glow sticks, among several other items. It's amazing, but there was so much excitement in the air that it was impossible to be sleepy despite the time.

Now, I'm not too shy to share that I had pre-race jitters. I'd had nightmares, one of which suggested I'd be swept by mile five. Butterflies invaded my tummy for days before the race; they were almost as active as when I met my husband! However, I was truly blessed to have a wonderful woman run with me, and she helped me realize how strong and capable I was. When we got to the start line, she told me to turn around and look back. I could see an ocean of runners, waiting for their turn to take off and fly. It was so humbling to see so many other wonderful people behind me, and quite comforting to know that not only did I have a buffer, but that I wouldn't be alone.

When the time to run came, I was deeply impressed that the camaraderie and joy remained, even for those who were serious about their race.As I chatted with my wonderful new friend we saw other runners pass us, some slow down, but almost all smiling. I found out that my running companion and I are apparently twins and have a ridiculous mass of interests and beliefs in common. Passing the time with her made running seem... *gasp*... easy. In fact, it was the best run I'd ever had, simply because I enjoyed the company so much.

Beyond that, there was plenty going on to keep me motivated and in awe. We passed some of the floats used in the Disney parades and I specifically recall passing the Mary Poppins based float and singing Supercalifragalisticexpialidocious. Loudly. Very loudly.

There were marching bands and cheerleaders, dancers, and hilarious spectator signs. And the characters. Oh, the characters! I have a special place in my heart for the fabulous characters (and the wonderful people playing said characters) at Disney parks. They're always so animated and play their roles so well. Captain Hook was no exception during the race. I had dressed as Captain Hook - but with a twist. I was Captain Hook being attacked by Tick Tock the crocodile. Naturally, A torn up outfit wasn't enough; I had to attach a stuffed Tick Tock to myself. Hook was the only character I wanted a photo with on course, so after waiting in line for several minutes, I was thrilled when my turn came. I ran up next to him, and before I could say a word - he ran AWAY from ME! He saw Tick Tock and hid behind another pirate. It's this kind of dedication that blows me away every time. We certainly got a good laugh before moving on, and I am so grateful for that experience.

There was no best part of the race, but crossing that finish line is certainly one of the moments I will treasure for the rest of my life. I was emotional, and my new RBF (running best friend) was so exited that I just couldn't stop myself from cry-laughing. Made for an awkward finish line photo, but I love it nonetheless. Now that the race is over, I should try to be getting back to the rest of my life. But, of course, that's ridiculous. Instead, I'll wait not-so-patiently for Princess Half Marathon Weekend and keep on running! And maybe admire my new bling...

Until next time!

Catching Up...

Life certainly has a way of getting in the way of...well, life. Sometimes I feel like I'm two separate people who have completely different goals and lifestyles that want to be congruent but can't seem to get together. There's the "responsible" me that just started a new job and master's program. And then there's the "fun" me, the one that wants to run, play, and spend ridiculous amounts of time at Disneyland with her husband and friends.

Sadly, the responsible me has taken over for the last couple of months. Now I know she's important, but she's so BORING! I've actually made a couple of very significant changes. I left the counseling program that I'd spent the last year and a half obsessing over. I realized that although I desperately want to help people, the capacity I'd do so with a master's in counseling just isn't the way I want to do it. So now, I've started a master's in a subject I NEVER thought I'd pursue. I'm in a dual degree program that will earn me a Master of Business Administration and a Master of Science in Leadership. I enjoy leadership, but business? I may be going insane (if so, beware of heads exploding... maybe I just need a good long run?). Honestly, I'm mostly doing it to help my husband. He'll be opening his own craft brewery soon, and it would be useful for one of us to know something about business. On top of that, I just started a new job, and that's always a source of stress for me. I hate feeling like I don't know what I'm doing.

Well, enough of that sob story. I'm baaaack! Can I be that excited to return to something I had only just barely started? I'm really looking forward to sharing more of my experiences with you all, and there couldn't be a better time to do it... On January 19th, everything changes!

We'll come back to that in just over a week. For now, here's a recap of what I've been up to, running-wise. First off, I ran the ROC Race (Ridiculous Obstacle Challenge) in Scottsdale, AZ in November. That was ridiculous alright... ridiculously AWESOME! I had a blast! The giant moon bounce really sealed the deal. The very next day I ran my second 10K - the Phoenix 10K. That was really nice also. It was hard, but I PRed by about a minute and went to lunch with a friend and her boyfriend afterwards. She'll be running the Princess Half-Marathon with me, so we were hoping to get a decent proof-of-time to move up a corral or two. We turtles will take every break we can get!

From there I also did a Turkey Day 10K that I sort of DNF (at least that's how I feel since I had to cut off part of the course). When the cops say the streets are opening in that part of downtown Phoenix, you find the rest of the group. Period. Now, I'm slow, but not that slow. However, I couldn't get past the 5K runners so I started the 10K later than everyone else! I did an Ugly Sweater 5K with a few friends, although we basically walked the whole thing. The Ugly Sweater Run wasn't my favorite, but hey, you can't win them all.

The best running moment since my last post, and arguably, my best in 2013 as a whole, was the Hot Chocolate 15K. I cannot say enough good things about this race. Maybe I loved it because I had some pretty special PRs, but I honestly thought it was fantastically organized. All of the volunteers were cheerful and friendly. The hoodie all runners received was extremely comfortable and durable. They had enough aid stations, we had a great course, and the fondue and hot chocolate available to finishers was insanely delicious! But what really got to me about this race was my performance. Of course I was in a SparkleSkirt and Minnie Ears (isn't that the normal thing to do?), but I didn't just look good. I usually use a 2/1 run/walk ratio. I'd never run more than a mile and a half without a walk break. But that day, when my watch beeped to let me know to walk, I decided to keep running. I felt good. Next thing I know, I'm thinking I can make it to two miles. Then, 5K. Then, I somehow ended up making it to the 10K mark, still holding strong. I didn't feel like I needed to stop until about mile 7, but by then sheer stubbornness kicked in. I RAN the whole 9.3 miles! I was just as slow as if I'd used the Galloway run/walk method, but I had never been so proud. The sheer joy (and shock) I felt was completely new. I think it was the first time I ever truly felt like "a runner." I know it was the first time I couldn't have cared any less about pace. And later that day, a couple of women who I'd run alongside for quite a while actually stopped and told me they tried to keep up with me but couldn't! It was like my first kiss all over again. I was dazed, and utterly elated.

After all that, I think it's time for this girl to get some sleep. But I do want to thank you, whoever you are, for sharing my story with me. I'd love for you to continue to follow along as I get the hang of this running thing, and I'll be back very soon with another chapter.

Happy running!